Flannel Burp Rags

So CUTE!

SUPPLIES: (makes 4 burp rags)

1 1/2 yards flannel (base color)

1/2 yard flannel (embellishment)

 

DIRECTIONS:

1. Cut out your pieces: four 12" x 45" pieces of the base color fabric & eight 6" x 45" pieces of the embellishment fabric

Cut out the pieces

 

2. Lay the long strip of base fabric out then fold it into thirds, overlapping the ends. Your two raw ends should be in the middle with two folded edges on the outsides. Place the embellishment strips on the top and bottom of the folded piece with right sides facing out.

Fold the burp rag overlapping the ends

 

Laid flat and ready to sew

3. Zigzag stitch over all of the raw ends (either side of the embellishment and the top and bottom of the whole rag). It is not necessary to sew the folded edges unless you want to.

Zigzag stitch raw edges

4. As you are sewing you may find it faster to "chain stitch" between multiple rags. Rather than sewing all of the edges of each rag individually, sew one line for each of them all at once feeding one rag after another (stay stitch the ends) without cutting the thread in between until that line is done. Then clip them apart and do the next line in the same way.

TIP: chain stitch one line of stitches at a time

5. To finish, check to make sure all the raw edges were caught by your stitches, trim any excess fabric and threads and you are done! :)

Finished burp rag

DIY Boppy Cover Tutorial

Three kids later my Boppy Pillow needed a face lift. After digging through my fabric scraps and a few trial runs, I have a tutorial for you that works beautifully!! Just FYI - this is for a cover that is non-removable, not a slip cover (no zipper, snaps or flap).

 

Add caption

SUPPLIES:

2/3 yard fabric

1/2 yard thin elastic

 

INSTRUCTIONS:

1. With approximately 2/3 yard of fabric folded in half, lay your boppy down with the "arms" open wide. You may need a helper. Trace the outline of your boppy leaving a generous 1 to 2 inch border. (A wide border and outstretched layout are both IMPORTANT --- I ripped the first two I made because I didn't leave enough fabric for it to stretch)

Hello pregnant belly :)

2. Cut out two identical layers of fabric. You can see from my photo that the boppy was "open" when I traced it.

Fabric cut & ready to sew

3. Starting on the top at one of the corners and right sides together, sew a 1/4" seam. When you get to the inside middle sew in your elastic with approximately 50% tension (not loose, not tight). Continue sewing your 1/4" seam until you get to the first coner again. STOP when you get to about 10" from where you started. This may seem like a wide opening but its necessary for the pillow to fit.

1/4" seam and elastic middle

4. Turn the cover right side out and stuff your boppy inside. Helps to bunch it up at the ends like when you are putting on panty hoes. ;)

Boppy stuffed into cover

5. Hand stitch the opening with matching thread, and you are done!

Hand stitched closed

DIY Nursing Tank {Pintrest Craft Success}

I saw these on Pinterest and immediately added them to my sewing to-do list!!! Such a fabulous idea --- when worn as an undershirt the tank top provides coverage for your side and stomach so your top shirt can be lifted without your whole side hanging out.

To nurse your baby just leave a small gap between your shirts for your baby to latch on. With practice it is able to nurse uncovered (GASP!) without the entire world seeing your chest. :)

 

1. With spaghetti strapped tanks, start by clipping the strap from the back of the shirt. Leave the front of the strap intact. 

 

2. Sew a small loop 3/4"-1" where the front straps start just over the chest of the shirt. Trim the strap. DONE! 

TO WEAR: 

Hook the loop over the flap of your nursing bra before clipping closed.

If you haven't seen the Luv's Breastfeeding Commercial --- its worth it! Love breastfeeding my babies and strongly believe every mom has the right to nurse her child however she feels comfortable wherever she feels comfortable. Can't say I am bold enough to show as much skin as this mom though. These tanks give me a sense of modesty even when I choose not to use a cover.

 

Keeping the Car Organized

The kids are too old for a diaper bag, but its still nice to have things on hand for them --- just in case! You can thank me later. ;) 

{DIY BIG KID CAR KIT}

Per Child:

-Change of clothes in a ziplock bag

-Age appropriate activity/new toy

For Toddlers:

-Disposable sippy cups

-Adhesive disposable placemats

-Baby spoon/spork

Family Bin:

-Snacks

-Mini water bottles or juice boxes

-Sunscreen

-Ziplock bags (large)

-Grocery bags

-Wipes

-Bandaids & Neosporin

-Paper Towels

-Hand Sanitizer

Here a what other moms had to say when I asked what they always kept in their car...

Lacey, mom of 3

"wipes, music, snack, sippy cup for eating out and extra shoes"

Alison, mom of 1

"books, blanket, teddy of some sort, tissues, sealed carton drink (the type that has a straw attached)"

Jen, mom of 5

"sunscreen, wipes, bandaids and a snack"

Brenna, mom of 3

"wipes, extra outfit for each, busy bags, snacks, juice boxes"

Megan, mom of 3

"diapers, wipes, snack and an ipad"

Brandis, mom of 3

"Water, wipes, sunscreen, diaper or two, empty sippy cup, their lovies"

Keep your things organized in a backseat organizer like this one! 

You can find a photo tutorial at the link bellow. It took about 4-5 hours to make and 2 yards of fabric plus ribbon (the tutorial calls for nylon belting and cording). 

http://sewing.craftgossip.com/tutorial-seat-car-organizer/2013/05/24/

Homemade Nursing Pads Tutorial

With baby #4 coming in just a few weeks the nesting phase has definitely set in. At the top of my seeing to do list were homemade nursing pads. I love-love-love these for so many reasons, mostly because they are so soft and reusable. They are easy to make too - check it out...

Supplies (yield 20 pair):

1 yard soft flannel

1/2 yard PUL (polyurethane laminate) - typically a cloth diaper fabric

Matching thread

Instructions:

1. With the fabric folded in half, mark as many 4" circles as you can fit on the flannel & PUL. I used a stadium cup and was able to mark 40 circles on the flannel and 20 on the PUL with each folder in half. 

2. Cut out the circles with the fabrics still in half, yielding twice as many 4" circles of each fabric. (80 flannel, 40 PUL). 

3. You will make a 3 layer fabric sandwich, made of 2 layers of flannel and one of PUL. With the shiny side of the PUL facing the flannel and the right side of the flannel facing out. Serger or zigzag stitch over the edge of the layers making sure to catch both the top and bottom layers. Trim threads. 

USE & WASHING INSTRUCTIONS: 

Change nursing pads promptly when wet/damp to prevent irritations and chapping. Hand wash used nursing pads with gentle laundry detergent* without fragrances, enzymes, bleach or phosphates --- typically for sensitive skin. Do not use fabric softener. (Nursing pads may also be washed with cloth diapers if you use them) Tumble dry low or air dry. 

If you develop a rash or irritation while using your nursing pads try a more gentle detergent. (Search detergents for cloth diapering)

*Suggested Detergent: 

Woolite for delicates (pink bottle)

10 Baby Shower Ideas for the Baby Not First Born

With four kids I understand the awkwardness of having more than one baby shower. Every baby deserves to be celebrated just like the first, we just have to think outside of the box a little. Here are {10 Baby Shower Ideas for Babies Not First Born}

1. Scrapbooking Shower

Guest bring scrapbooking supplies to fit the theme that mom chooses. Enjoy each others company as you create the baby's first year album together. By the end of your party she will have a completed album ready for photos to simply be glued right onto the page. If you need some inspiration consider inviting an independent consultant from a scrapbooking company like Creative Memories to join you. (Mom gets the hostess benefits) 

*Did this for my third child & LOVED it!!

2. Piggy-Bank Shower

Give baby's bank account a head start! Guests fill a giant piggy bank with cash and checks as they arrive. 

3. Diaper Shower

Diapers and wipes only please! No wrapping, no thank you notes - just lots and lots of diapers! Hooray!!

4. Spa Party

What mom doesn't want her toes polished and her back rubbed?! Do come calling around and recruit a few consultants or students to pamper mom and her guest. Facials, foot soaks, massages oh my!!

If you are worried about sales pressure be up front and offer to pay the consultant for her time in exchange for a no-pressure time of relaxation. 

5. Freezer Meal Shower

Guests bring frozen meals for mom in lieu of baby gifts. As one if your activities do a recipe exchange and put together a collection of freezer meals, crockpot meals and other dinner ideas that are quick and easy to prepare for a mom now juggling two (or more) kiddos at meal time. 

6. Long-Distance Party

As a military family I know all too well that life sometimes doesn't wait for babies to arrive and you find yourself across the country without a friend anywhere close. Bless the mom who has just moved with an albumn of handwritten letters, notes and photos to remind her that her friends and family are only a phone call away. For gifts consider stuffing flat rate boxes and bombarding her with care packages at her new home --- stagger shipping so they just keep coming. (See also Cash-Raffle Party below)

7. Cash Raffle Party

Have friends and family pick a date they think baby will be born! To reserve the date they have to pay a certain amount (we did $20). Then on baby's birthday the winner gets half the money and baby/mom get the other half! Great way to pitch in for larger items that are often needed with additional kiddos - like a minivan (ahem).   

8. Welcome Home Party

Instead of celebrating before baby arrives wait until after (especially nice when the gender is going to be a surprise). When mom feels ready (maybe 1-2 weeks postpartum) have a get together to bless the new baby. Mom will have a better idea of what she needs and wants that she doesn't already have then too. 

9. Donation Shower

For the mom who has everything already, consider this special way to celebrate. Have a regular baby shower but have guest bring gifts to donate to the local pregnancy center or money for an organization that supports moms of still born babies or parents of children with special needs. (Call your local hospital for more information on these in your area)

10. Ladies Night Out

Skip the silly games and have a gun night out. Go to a nice restaurant like The Melting Pot, to a chick flick at the theater, or book group mani/pedi at the local spa --- anything goes! 

Baby Shower Gift Ideas for the Mom Who Already Has Kids

Diapers 

Wipes

Baby Powder

Lotion

Diaper Cream

Baby Soap

Gas Drops

Baby Tylenol/Motrin

Teething Gel/Tablets

Custom/Personalized Items

Professional Photo Session

Babysitting Coupons

Date Night Gift Cards 

Maid Service

Prepaid Digital Photo Printing (Snapfish, Shutterfly, Walgreens)

Quiet time activities for the older child(ren) while nursing

Double Stroller

Second Dresser

Toddler Bed

Journal

New Carseat for the Older Child

Custom Mom Jewelry

Gift certificate for local mom & baby classes (baby sign language, Gymboree, etc)

Gift Certificate for Auto Detailing

Remind me that they're little

When I am tired at the end of the day

When my kids need more of me than I feel I have left to give

When they are whiney and clingy

Lord, remind me that they are little

When they wake up earlier than the sun

When they refuse to nap

When they fight bedtime with every fiber of their being 

Lord, remind me that they are little

When they spill their juice and throw their dinner on the floor

When there are constantly crumbs stuck to my bare feet

When they won't drink milk without chocolate

Lord, remind me that they are little

When they ask me to read to them

When they ask me to play

When they ask me to color

Lord, remind me that they are little

When they jump and shout and run 

When they think poop and boogers are the funniest thing on the face of the Earth

When they play with the hose and mud every time they go outside

Lord, remind me that they are little

When my house littered with toys & Legos

When the dishes are never done

When they laundry pile never goes away

Lord, remind me that they are little

When they ask me 'why' a thousand times

When they forget to do their chores

When their Christmas wish list is at least a mile long

Lord, remind me that they are little

When they crawl in bed to cuddle

When they ask for one more hug

When they crawl into my lap

Lord, remind me that they are little

My time with them is fleeting

And sweet moments come and go

Before I know it they'll be gone

Lord, remind me that they are little

When my patience is running low

When my discipline has been to harsh

When my tired soul just needs a rest

Lord, remind me that they are little

You have blessed me with these children

And put their tender lives into my hands

They've changed my life more than words can tell

Lord, don't ever let me forget that they are little

50 Things to do this Summer for FREE

Summer doesn't have to be expensive, kids just want permission to play, to be loud and to have fun. With a little planning and creativity your summer days can be filled with memories for free!! 

I'd love to hear from you...what's your favorite summer memory from your childhood?

1. Photo scavenger hunt - take pictures of things around your house and have the kids find them. For older kids take close ups so thy have to fugue them out a little more

2. Neighborhood BINGO - write thing you might see around your house on a 5x5 set of squares. 

3. Make your own obsticle coarse and have a relay race

4. Decorate your yard or porch like the beach and pretend you are on vacation somewhere tropical

5. Play make believe while you are on a walk - take turns making up stories about all the things that you see along the way

6. Water Corn Hole - Mark shapes on the sidewalk and see who can land the closest using sponge bombs

7. Splash T-Ball/Baseball - replace your softball or wiffleball with water balloons

8. Impromptu Jacks - with small rocks or pebbles, toss one into the air and try to pick up another one, two, three and so one before catching the one that is falling

9. Make a treasure map (or have your kids make one). Then follow the map to the treasure and X marks the spot 

10. Build a fort and have a water balloon war

11. Draw with chalk on the wet sidewalk

12. Freeze toys into a block of ice and get em back out

13. Surprise the kids with new water guns or a bin filled with water balloons and let them go at it

14. Paint with water and paintbrushes on the sidewalk or construction paper

15. Use a turkey baster to fill up cups. Use a rubber band to mark lines

16. Explore with oil, water and food coloring

17. Gather things to see if they will sink or float

18. Poke holes in an old hose for a wacky water sprinkler

19. Add plastic balls to a baby pool filled with water

20. Have a car wash party - get the bikes, trucks, and scooters all soapy! 

21. Make real fruit popsicles from scratch

22. Have a banana split for breakfast 

23. Have a pizza party with homemade personal pizza and lots of toppings

24. Learn about the different types of clouds

25. Make a summer bucket list scrapbook using supplies you have at home and pictures of all the fun things you did

26. Give your kids a basket of random ingredients and let them make thier own snack. 

27. Plant a flower (or small vegetable like carrots) and have your kids take care of it

28. Make a bird bath or bird feeder from an large over turned pot with the base glued to the top

29. Make lemonade from scratch. Add frozen fruit for a fancy treat

30. Play with bubbles. Try filling a baby pool with bubble solution and make giant bubbles using a hula-hoop. Try standing inside the bubble. 

31. Have a picnic lunch at a new park/playground 

32. Take a new route when you go for a walk

33. Go camping in the backyard - s'mores and sleeping bags required

34. Visit a local garden or farm to learn where fruits and vegetables come from

35. Go to the library for story time or other fun activities they have planned

36. Play tourist in your own town

37. Learn all about the city where you live. Make a poster to show all about it

39. Visit the mint, state capital or museum

40. Ask for a tour of the places you visit to see how things work, like the bowling alley, the library, the post office, the movie theater, a reataurant or even the grocery sore (call ahead to make sure they're not busy)

41. Use face paint

42. Have a backwards day

43. Act out a book you read

44. Have a shaving cream fight

45. Have a 'YES' day - set a budget then anything the kids want goes

46. Learn a secret language like Pig-Latin

47. Leave your kids notes in a secret code all over the house with clues for them to figure out

48. Dance to music turned up REALLY LOUD!

49. Have a theme day (like princesses and knights). Wear costumes and play make believe. Find games and snack ideas to go with your theme online

50. Dance in the rain and jump in big puddles

Divine Intervention

Sometimes when God moves in your life it is as plain as the nose on your face. Other times it is incredibly subtle and because we become so consumed with life happening around us we don't notice until we look back that He had been moving in a strong and powerful way. I have a special place in my heart for women who have had or have considered having an abortion. I was one of those women.

I was in my 2nd year of college at a conservative Christian school, engaged to the man of my dreams when we found out that I was pregnant. I will never forget the terror that entered my heart when I saw those two little pink lines. I told myself that if the baby's heart had not started beating yet that I would terminate the pregnancy and justified it in my mind allowing the world to silence the voice in my heart screaming that I would be scarred forever. I made an appointment at Planned Parenthood. I remember feeling incredibly guilty and ashamed that I would even be there considering the whole thing. When they called my name, they made my fiance stay in the waiting room. They took me back to a private room where they did an ultrasound to confirm my pregnancy. The screen was turned away from me and I could not see anything she was looking at. She said very little except to confirm that I was pregnant - about 5 weeks - but also that she couldn't see the "embryo" which made her think that I may have and ectopic pregnancy. She explained what that was and that it could be fatal to me if I did not "take care of it in time." She gave me a paper that listed symptoms that my fallopian tube had burst and needed to go to the ER immediately, then made an appointment for me to come back to pick up the medication that I could take to end the pregnancy.

We left the clinic and were headed to have brunch with my Dad when my back started hurting incredibly bad (a symptom of an ectopic pregnancy). Afraid that I was in danger we went to the closest ER. Once checked in the pain had stopped by the doctor was concerned that I may have a blood clot so they ordered a cat scan. They warned me of the risk involved with the test during pregnancy but at that time I was still convinced that I wanted an abortion so I went ahead with the test. When they took me into the room in radiology the nurse again warned me of the risks. The first thing that caught my attention was that the nurse and I had the same first name. Uncommon and a bit of a coincidence but not completely out of the ordinary. Then the nurse completely caught my attention and said something that would change my life forever! She came around the the front of the bed so she was facing me, grabbed my hand and looked me straight in the eyes and said, "I can't help it because I am a mom. Are you sure you want to do this?" I said that I was (refering to the cat scan), and she replied, "I will cover your belly with two leads just to be safe." then continued with the test. A while later the doctor came in to report that they had found nothing wrong but told me to come back if the pain returned. No mention of the risk of an eptopic pregnancy whatsoever. When we left the hospital I grabbed my fiance's hand - he and I both knew that we couldn't go through with an abortion.

God intervined in my life that day and saved the life of my firstborn son!! Looking back I can now see His loving hand so clearly that I get chills. Unexplained back pain - the nurse who shared my name - a maternal plee. When all this happened it had been less than 2 years since my own mom had passed away from cancer. My heart was still broken and I was ultra-sensative to the honest and compassionate words the nurse spoke that day. She was talking about the cat scan, but in my heart God was crying out a plea to the life decision I was about to make.

On this Mother's Day, my heart is overflowing with love for my children, sorrow that my mom is not here to share in our joy, and an eternal gratitude to my Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ who loves all His children even the unborn from the moment they are concieved and will move heaven and earth to keep them safe. My heart aches for the millions of women who are reminded today of children and babies that they have lost, and pray that they too can find rest in the God who loves them and holds them close to His heart, waiting - crying out to them to lay down their burdens and find peace. Happy Mother's Day & may God bless each of you on this special day!

Mommy Time-Out Ideas

I teasingly posted on my Facebook page that I was going to put a cooler full of ice cream and chocolate on my porch to enjoy every few hours to escape from the chaos of mothering. While it seems funny you have to admit that it sounds enticing doesn't it?! I rarely get a break - and without an excuse to be alone even my break time involves my kids. It's like some sort of tracker beacon was implanted after childbirth...the kids are content so I slip away for just a moment - even just to pee with the door shut - and instantly they are calling for me, banging on the door to find me! SERIOUSLY?!

If you've ever had the blessing of being away from your kids for even a few hours to just sit and be alone you will agree that a relaxed mom is a more patient and more fun mom. My husband can always tell when I haven't been getting enough time to myself and has been know to kick me out of the house for an non-negotiable "mommy time out" right smack dab in the middle of one of my rants. Have you been there? Please tell me I'm not the only one. Here is a fun poster that I created just for you to download and stick on your fridge! (Click on the image below for a free printable PDF file)

{Orange Rhino Challenge} UPDATE

Well, it has been 23 days since I commited to stop yelling at my kids with The Orange Rhino Challage. Today I am on Day 2 (my kids behaved yesterday and spent most of the afternoon playing downstairs). I am writting to encourage you because as I quickly realized that this is going harder than I thought it would be. Late afternoons are super hard for us - my kids are whiney, I am tired, they don't listen so I yell. After having to start over, well about 20 times, my accountability partner and I realized that maybe it might be better to focus on a trigger to start with rather than an entire day. Genious!! Take the day off from the challenge to put a fly on the wall so to speak --- watch yourself and notice when you are most likely to yell. These are (a few) of my triggers...

• When the house get so messy I start to step on toys (especially in the kitchen at dinnertime)
• When my four year old gets hyper and acts so silly that he won't do what I've asked him to
• When my two year old thrown toys or dumps out the crayon box
• When I have to ask them to do things over and over
• When they talk back or whine when I say no

So yesterday, after a REALLY bad day the night before I decided to focus on just one thing for each child. And what I found was the entire day got better - I didn't yell yesterday, not even once. I did feel the urge once or twice - so the day wasn't a complete fluke.

Even as I am writting this and looking at my list of triggers I am beginning to realize that my kids may not be the issue - but me. When I look at my list from a perspective of TRUTH and LOVE this is what I find...

• Messy house: Kids ARE messy! This is the season of life that we are in and I should be thankful that my home is filled with noise and toys because this too shall pass and one day they will be out of my home and I will wish they were still here.
• Hyper kids: I have boys - boys are loud, and what a party-pooper am I to squash his fun and natural sense of humor. I need to loosen up!
• Throwing/Dumping toys on the floor: Really - he's two and learning about the way the world works...how things fly and things fall. I need to provide a more constructive outlet for his desire to learn, get down on the floor and play with him. Fill a bin with rice and show him how it falls from a cup. Or throw a ball with him. Again my fault not his!
• Repeating meself: This is a discipline issue that I do think needs to be worked on - make sure they are paying attention when I tell them what I would like them to do and the consequence if they don't follow through. Set the timer and walk away. No counting, no nagging, no repeating, done. They do it - great. They don't - consequence.
• Back talk/whining: No means no, and all whiners will have to go to their room until they have a better attitude. Out of my face means less yelling.

Finally, here are a few Bible verses that have helped me...

Proverbs 15:18   "A hot-tempered person stirs up conflict, but the one who is patient calms a quarrel."
Proverbs 29:11   "Fools give full vent to their rage, but the wise bring calm in the end."
Ecclesiates 10:4b   "Calmness can lay great offenses to rest."
Proverbs 14:30a   "A heart at peace gives life to the body"
Colossians 3:15   "Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful."

The TRUTH About The First Week

My cousin just welcomed her first child into the world last weekend and it had me thinking and remembering when I became a Mommy for the very first time almost 8 years ago - yikes!! We had taken Lamaze classes to help prepare for labor (that was NOTHING like what they described) and even though I had been counting the days until I would hold my baby boy in my arms I was scared! Scared of labor. Scared of motherhood. Scared of losing my future. Even scared of my baby. So, from one mama to another here are a few suggestions and a little of what you can expect the first week after your new baby is born.

Let me start by saying that after giving birth 3 times it is important to remember that EVERY MOM, EVERY BIRTH, and EVERY BABY IS DIFFERENT! This is what I have learned from my own experience...

Labor is hard. Really hard! But you can do it!!
When I was in labor with my first son, my contractions never stopped. In Lamaze, they said I would get a break in between --- I didn't with my first labor (I did with the other two, so its they aren't telling you all lies). Only a few hours into active labor I was already exhausted and my moaning was so loud that my nurse actually told me to be quiet because I was scaring the other patients (YES that REALLY happened!!). Even though I was determined to have a "natural" labor I agreed to medication to help ease the pain and actually fell asleep once they gave it to me. When my beautiful baby boy was born a few hours later, I was utterly exhausted. But I remember thinking I had done it! God created my body with the ability to give birth to a child, and with His help --- I had done it! I also swore that I would never do it again, but with time your mind puts away the memory of the pain of childbirth and leaves behind the feeling of complete JOY and the miracle of new life.

My advice: Have a birth plan but be flexible and know that it is okay if things don't go just like you planned. In the end, you will still hold your precious child in your arms.

You are going to be tired EXHAUSTED! It is worth it!!
I have never been more tired in my whole life than in the first week after my son was born. My son was an eager eater from the moment he was born -- he was 8 lb 1 oz -- so after nursing him every 30-45 minutes around the clock for the first 24 hours of his life and no rest since delivery for me, I willingly and eagerly agreed to let my nurse give him a bottle of formula. She took him to the nursery, while I fell into an exhausted sleep. 3 hours later I woke up panicked that my baby was missing only to find him swaddled and sleeping like an angel nearby. That was the moment when I fell in love with my child. I will never forget it. My heart was INSTANTLY filled with an indescribable ADORATION for this child whom I barely knew. The next few weeks as my husband and I learned about parenthood were filled with equal amounts of awe and frustration. We were tired more tired than we had ever been and really had no clue what we were doing, but we had our son - and that made it all worth it.

My advice: Giving your child formula between nursing is not the end of the world - once my milk came in, I stopped supplementing and breastfeed successfully until my son was 8 months old.

Trust your heart, and don't take every piece of advice people give you.
I swear I got about 10 new mothers when my son was born and every one of them had advice on what I should do with my baby. I was a new mom and they were only trying to help, but all I heard was criticism and what I was doing wrong. HEAR THIS!! You are a GOOD MOM and God has put an instinct in your heart that will help you raise your child and show you what to do. Letting him sleep in the swing because that is the only way you can sleep to IS OKAY! Letting him fuss so you can pee without holding him IS OKAY! Letting him play alone for a while so you can be alone too IS OKAY! Not wearing a moby wrap because you are too exhausted to figure out how to put the stinking thing on IS OKAY! Breastfeeding him to sleep and holding him in your arms IS OKAY!

My advice: Enjoy your baby - and all its ups and downs - for this too shall pass and they only stay little for so long.

Don't be afraid to ask for help.
People want to help but often are too embarrassed to ask or don't really know what they need. If you have no time to cook, ask a friend to bring you a meal (or order a pizza). If your laundry pile is higher than Mt. Everest ask a family member to wash a load, or for me fold and put away the pile that is clean but has since been ignored. If you need a nap, ask a friend to come "babysit" at your house while you take a nap. (I say at your house, because if you are anything like me having your new baby any more than a room away will cause enough anxiety to keep you awake anyways).

My advice: Enjoy your new baby - all the rest of it doesn't really matter in the end.

Spend time ALONE with your family!
Everyone you know will be anxious to visit you and to meet your baby. Don't rush it. When my next child is born this summer, I don't plan having company until at least a week after we get home - certainly not within the first few days. Spend a few days getting to know your new baby and welcoming him or her into your home. This is a special time that you should keep special between you and your husband. Don't get me wrong - I am all about having someone come stay to help out, but let them do the housework while you and your hubby fall in love with your child.

My advice: Spend as much time alone with your child and your spouse as you can - it may be the only time you will ever be alone together for quite a while.

"I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful!"

Psalm 139:14

Jumping In With Both Feet

A few weeks ago a friend compared me to Michelle Duggar. She said, "You are alway so calm with your kids, do you ever yell at them?" My four year old was sitting beside me and wasn't shy to share that I do loose my temper. Why do we put on our "Good Mommy" masks and have an endless resivior of patience anywhere but inside the four walls and privacy of our home? I heard about The Orange Rhino Challage and thought --- there is NO WAY! But after giving it some thought a Still Small Voice began to tug at my heart strings. My boys deserve better than an angry, tempermental, ready-to-snap mommy. We only have so long with them and as memories are being made I want them to be good. I am gonna have to start over at least once, but I something like this is WORTH IT!! Who's with me???

So, I am taking the 365 day challenge --- I am commited to stop yelling at my kids. Find out more about The Orange Rhino Challenge at her blog and follow her on facebook!!

Why Every Mom Deserves A Day Off

For the first time since my oldest son was born 7 years ago, I spent the entire weekend completely and totally by myself! Thank you Babe - you are AMAZING (but little did you know you just opened Pandora's Box). When my husband left with my three boys yesterday morning it took a little getting used to the quiet and the freedom that had just fallen into my lap. As I began to continue with my usual routine of picking up after everyone and cleaning house, I had to tell my guilt conscience to take a leap because for the 48 hours I had resolved to do NOTHING for anyone else but myself! Selfish - a little. But do I deserve it - ABSOLUTELY! The laundry will still be there on Monday morning and the errands can wait. The chance to do whatever my little heart desired is something that is rare. Moms don't get excited about Friday - because having the "weekend off" doesn't exists for us anymore. I honestly can tell you from 7 years experience as a SAHM --- it is truly the most sacrificial, exhausting, and challenging job that you will ever have! But it is also the most rewarding, beneficial, and fulfilling job you are blessed to have!! It is a blessing - but everyone, ESPECIALLY SAHMs, need a day off. And if you are like me and haven't had one since the birth of your first child, I challenge you to make it a priority, put it on the calendar, find a sitter if you have to and make it happen.

Top 10 Tips for your Mom's Day Off

10. Spend time alone.

We are around people all the time. Give yourself a large portion of time (if not all of it) to just be alone. How long has it been since you we are to do what YOU wanted to do, when you wanted to do it. Most moms are very good about making sure that everyone else gets what they need -- during your day off focus on what YOU need!!!

 

9. Turn off your gadgets.

In the last decade we have become obsessively "plugged in" - to the TV, to music, to the computer, to our smart phones. I would think it safe to assume over 90% of our daily routine involves some sort of an electronic. And the chaos of children and babies only adds to the noise! Our brains are on overload and begging for quiet. Spend some time enjoying the peace of silence.

 

8. Make a to-do list.

It will take you a little while to not feel the urge to get up and do something - to clean, to run errands, to get that one thing done that you've been putting off. You only have a little while to truly relax -- make a list of things to do when your day off is over. The list can wait, I promise!

 

7. Sleep in.

I have never spoken to a mom (at least one with kids still at home), who can honestly say they feel well rested and like they get enough sleep at night. This is a secret that no one ever told me before I had kids --- Your babies won't sleep through the night, and when they do they will wake you up before dawn! I rarely get the opportunity to go to bed and sleep until I wake up on my own. So this morning when I saw sunlight shining under the door, I actually leapt out of bed to see if someone had come home. (I thought there was a light on in the house - because it has been that long since I have woken up after the sun)

 

6. Go out with your husband or with a friend.

Free childcare!!! Make plans to go out and enjoy yourself knowing that you can sleep in the next day!

 

5. Do what you love.

Stay in bed all day. Go shopping. Get a massage. Read a book from start to finish. Cook. Watch a movie. Go running. Get a manicure or pedicure. Take a bath. Give yourself a facial. Do a craft. Do you hair and makeup without feeling rushed. God made every mom different - we all love different things and feel recharged by different situations. Do what you love.

 

4. Give yourself an allowance.

Plan to have some money to spend on your day off based on your own family budget. (Or set aside Christmas and Birthday money to spend) Let someone else worry about dinner and the dishes for a change, buy a new outfit or a new book, or go to the spa.

 

3. Go somewhere you can relax.

For some people (like me) staying at home is the most relaxing place where you could be - all your things are where you can find them, you can sleep in your own bed, everything is familiar. But for others they look around and can only think of things that need to get done, so getting away is more relaxing.

 

2. Don't feel guilty.

I bet you can count on one hand the number of times that you had an entire day to yourself. Take the day off, make a list of what needs to get done later, relax and don't feel guilty about doing it. You deserve it - you work from sun up to sun down 7 days a week 365 days a year. You don't get sick days or vacation time --- THIS is your vacation! Enjoy it!!

 

1. Set aside time for worship and prayer.

God created us to need rest. Our culture pushes us to do the opposite. During your time off, plan a special time to be alone with God in worship and in prayer. Listen to quiet music, journal, pray. Leave your worries at the cross. Listen for the still small voice of God and let Him restore your weary soul.



My 2013 SAHM List of Resolutions

1. Be more active with my kids
Tangible Goal: 15 minutes of quality one-on-one time with each of them, doing something they would like to do.

2. Read to my kids every day
Tangible Goal: Make story time a part of our bedtime routine.

3. Keep up with the laundry and dishes
Tangible Goal: Start the day with a load of laundry in the washer & empty the dishwasher; finish the day with laundry folded and put away and dishwasher running.

4. Discipline in love
Tangible Goal: No more yelling. Build them up with two encouraging words for every time discipline is used. "You are so good at..." "I love it when you..." "It makes me proud when you..."

5. Maintain a stash of frozen meals to avoid lazy-mom-syndrome
Tangible Goal: Plan for 1-2 freezer meals every 2 weeks to have on hand for lazy days and sick days.

6. Have a Mommy Day Off once a month!!
Tangible Goal: Schedule it in advance, write it down in PEN, budget for $50 to spend, and plan for a sitter --- no excuses!!

7. Avoid 4 o'clock daily meltdowns
Tangible Goal: Plan for daily quiet time filled with fun activities for my kids - special basket with Kiwi Crate activities, Busy Bags and Art/Writing prompts.

8. Make my husband feel like he is the most important person in my life (second only to God)
Tangible Goal: Have an intentional LOVE RELATIONSHIP with my husband including a date night once a month and more tangible ways if showing him how much he means to me (gifts, notes, daily compliments).

9. Provide my family with quality meals and snacks
Tangible Goals: Less sugar and salt (fruit alternatives for dessert), prepare healthy snacks in advance to make them quick and easy.

10. Practice Mommy Time-Out when I start to lose my patience
Tangible Goal: Spend 5 minutes alone to calm down so that discipline can be practiced in love and not out of frustration.

Don't Think I'm Perfect

My blog it has been far more popular that I ever thought it would be, but with that I feel like I may have given you all a false impression of who I am - behind the scenes. Today is my confession - real and unfiltered.

Please don't think I'm perfect.
I'm not.
My home looks more like Family Circus than Leave it to Beaver.
I have piles of dirty laundry stacking up and go to bed with the sink still full of dishes.
I don't vacuum or sweep as often as I probably should and I can't stand cleaning the bathroom.
My priorities get mixed up and have to learn from my mistakes every stinking day.
I feel guilty every time I leave my kids and can't help but worry about them every second that I am gone.
I get frustrated with my kids more than I like and I can say with all honesty that if I caught them washing my car with the windows down - my response would not be 'you missed a spot.'
I have trouble remembering people's names - if I call you by a nickname it is because I completely forgot but I am too embarrassed to ask again.
I procrastinate.
I feed my kids cold cereal for breakfast and PB&J for lunch because I don't want to clean up the mess that cooking makes.
I am a perfectionist. Watching my kids decorate cookies or do crafts is like torture.
I can't stand to spend money on anything for myself.
If I think about it long enough there is probably a selfish motivation at least partially behind just about everything I do.
I eat chocolate every day.
I have bad habits that I can't quit no matter how hard I try.
I screw up cooking dinner at least once a week.
I have trouble saying no.
I don't exercise because I am just plain lazy.
I get completely stressed if there are toys all over the place.
I care too much what other people think about me.
My life is a constant battle for control.
My faith is weak.
My hope is often crushed by fear.
My prayers are often filled with doubt.

I have a lot to learn as a mom, a wife, and as a woman. We all have our struggles and we are all loved by the One who created us - baggage and all! Be careful what you say & be careful not to judge. Don't let your own self-worth be determined by what others are doing. They have skeletons in the closet just like you!!! Do the very best that you can and keep your eyes and heart focused on your own journey.

Out of the Rubble

Ten years ago my mom lost her battle with cancer – I was just 18 and barely out of high school. The years that have passed since then have been an emotional roller coaster, but I finally feel like I have come to a place where healing can begin. In sharing my story with you, I hope to bring you some peace in your own struggle with loss.

I had my life all figured out – I had a scholarship to the college of my choice, I was enrolled with classes picked out and bags packed ready to start my college career.  And then, in a single moment all of that went out the window and my entire world turned upside down. My parents divorced when I was 6, and my brother moved to California to live with my Dad –so I was pretty much an only child. Seeds of bitterness and jealousy were planted when my mom was diagnosed with MS (Multiple Sclerosis) the year I started high school. I would never experience my teenage years like any of my friends. While my friends were out, I was at home taking care of my mom. So as you can imagine we didn’t have the best relationship and most of our time was spent fighting. When my mom got cancer, I spent most of my time running away from the hurt I found at home. 

There is one memory that I cling to - It all hit home and became real for me when my mom stopped Chemo. She was put on Hospice and they moved a hospital bed into ourliving room. My mom was on morphine all the time and started sleeping more than she was awake. Until that moment we had never talked about what was going on and we hadn’t really moved on from the hurt that we had thrown at each other. She told me that she was dying and asked me if I was afraid. All I could do wascry and hold onto her – just like a child. We said ‘I love you’ and ‘I forgiveyou’ and hugged each other for a really long time. I needed that! A few days later she went into a coma; I would never hear my mom say those sweet words again.

In the years between then and now, God has been working and holding me up as I fought against a heart consumed with anger, hurt and mostly fear. “Why did this happento me? Am I going to die young too? Will I lose everything I love? I prayed so hard! Why didn’t God answer me? What did I do that was so wrong, that God would punish me this way?” All the time that I was pushing God away He stood strong at my side. God is bigger than all of our anger and he will continue to love us through it! There is a reason we can hold our children in love and forgive them time after time for even the most unreasonable tantrums and hurtful words – God is the author of love and giver of all that is good. God will not leave you in the ruble – even if you created it yourself – He is with you and will continueto bless you until you decide to look upinstead of down, and when you do you will find Him in the mess right beside you holding you up all along.

After years, I came to a point where I was entirely worn down and I had to make a choice. Was I going to continue to allow the past ruin the blessing I had been given today? I decided in my heart that I was no longer going to allow my mind to be filled with lies and past hurts – I realized that it was not God who had done this tome, and I decided that my family meant too much to me for my time with them to be wasted on fear.  Each day since then I remind myself of that and renew my promise that I will choose to live by TRUST and HOPE and THANKFULNESS! Some days are better than others, but now my mind is free of anger and my heart is no longer afraid. In life we are often dealtcards that we wouldn’t have chosen and that even seem unfair. But we have achoice of how we will react – and from one who was in the rubble for much too long, I urge you to cling to your faith and the hope that we find in Christ. I will never know why my childhood turned out the way it did or why my mom had to die so young, but I refuse to waste my life and the time I have left on regrets.

Play with your kids every day. Tell them often how much they mean to you! Pay attention to them when they are talking to you – don’t ever let them feel like your to-do list is more important than they are. Cuddle. Make memories together and write them down.  Take too many pictures.  Say I’m sorry, forgive quickly, and say ‘I love you’ even if you think they already know. Don’t fight about the small stuff. Don’t lose sight of the power of unconditional love. Never take tomorrow for granted! But most importantly, trust in the hope we have of eternal life found in Christ!

Guest Blogger: Battling Mommy Guilt

My last guest blogger is an amazing mama and she writes today about a topic that we all struggle with from time to time: mommy guilt! Thanks for writing Megan & welcome ---

"My baby is 7.2 weeks old and not only am I in my pre-pregnancy jeans, but I just ran a half marathon!"

"It's 10am and I have already made a loaf of bread, scrubbed the toilets, done two loads of laundry, started dinner, vacuumed the entire house, AND showered! What to do with the rest of my day?!?"

"'I'm so glad we co-sleep, use cloth diapers, make our own baby food, and follow the alternative vaccination schedule. Wouldn't do it any other way!"

"My three year old just recited the whole book of James from memory! Then emptied the dishwasher without complaining!"

Oh, Facebook. I love it as a tool to keep in touch with friends, but I also inadvertently end up comparing myself to said friends. More often than not, I determine I am not the super mom that they obviously are and find myself trapped in guilt, bitterness, self-condemnation, and jealousy. I can't count how many times I have thought about giving up Facebook, just so I don't have to read the super mom status updates!

If I compared myself to others before being a mom, I do so even more now! I desire, as I think most moms do, to be the best mom possible. So it's hard for me when I see other moms have decided to do something different from what I'm doing (whether it be staying at home vs working; disposable diapers vs cloth; forward facing carseat vs rear facing; jarred baby food vs pureeing it; couponing, cleaning, meal planning, discipline, and sleep training tactics... the list goes on and on). It's doubly hard when a well-meaning friend or family member questions what I'm doing. I wonder, "Am I doing this mom thing right? What if SHE'S doing it right and I'm doing it wrong?"

Then, usually - if I pause the self-talk long enough to breathe, I hear that still small voice reminding me that, just like my son, I am God's handiwork (Ephesians 2:10) and am fearfully and wonderfully made (Psalms 139:14). I am reminded to think about what is true (Philippians 4:8) and not let myself focus on what others are doing, but instead ask myself if I am doing what God has called ME to do? Am I honoring God, my husband, and my son with my choices? Beyond that, am I loving my mommy friends by "thinking no evil" and "believing all things" as 1 Corinthians 13 asks of me?

While pondering my own mommy guilt, I have realized that I have got to stop comparing myself to others. Just like I am trying to be the best mom that I can be, so are my friends. And because we all have different personalities, passions, strengths, and weaknesses, that is going to look different for all of us! The only "right way" for ME to do this mommy thing is by being the mommy that God has called ME to be. This mommy thing is hard. Instead of comparing myself to my mommy friends, I need to encourage them as they travel this road with me!

"Comparison is the thief of joy." - Theodore Roosevelt

Guest Blogger: Routines

I met my guest blogger today when our kids were just babies about 3 years ago - she is so inspirational to me, from her wholehearted devotion to her kids to her ability to keep her home running smoothly! Thank you Brandis for writing and welcome! :) Make sure you check out her Blog too {Anchored in the Air Force}

If I learned anything from my oldest son having colic, it was the importance of establishing a routine. I'm not saying it's the end all, be all of parenting by any means- but I think it's saved my sanity on more than one occasion.

Days where my boys don't want to nap, listen, spend all day throwing tantrums & toys, are the days that I'm counting down until bedtime. I'm sure most of you have felt this way at one time or another, & I've jokingly said that days where we make it to bedtime & we're all alive are successful days in our house.

When Cody was about two months old, he started crying. Obviously he'd been crying prior to that occasion, but he started crying. I must have read somewhere that establishing a nighttime routine prior to bedtime helped kids with colic, & although Cody wasn’t diagnosed with colic, I knew that’s what it was.

So I went out & bought the special Johnson & Johnson bedtime soap. I started giving that kid a bath at the EXACT same time every. stinking. night. Then I’d massage & lotion him up, turn down the lights, & rock him in his room with a bottle. I bought a white noise machine ( & we STILL use it every night to this day!), a nighltight, & I wasn’t playing around, ladies. I NEEDED this kid to stop crying & start sleeping. My husband was gone for four days at a time back then & I couldn’t survive the crying much longer, lol!

After about a week, his crying went from 3 hours a night to about 1.5 hours a night. Bliss.

After another week or so, Cody would go to bed around 630 & sleep. Sleep. Remember that? Sweet, glorious, gift from God himself sleep. He started sleeping through the night & NO MORE crying.

Maybe it was a coincidence. Maybe he just outgrew the colic. But I was a believer.

Do you have a routine with your kiddos? When we had our second son, Sawyer, I continued the routine path. By this time I had it down pat, & it wasn’t just sleep. Meals, bathtime, naps, etc., ALL had a routine & a time worked out. I wasn’t playing around.

Very rarely do I stray from our routine. I actually did it tonight & it was a NIGHTMARE. I try not to be overly obsessed with it or anything, but I tend to stick with it so nights like tonight don’t happen- my kids are usually in bed by 7:30, tonight they didn’t settle down until 9:00!

There’s times where I let it slide- we’ll have friends over, we’ll have those oh-so-rare date nights, or now, since our house is on the market, random showings during naptime or before bedtime- & every time I find myself full of anxiety about it, my husband telling me to relax & me realizing it’s not the end of the world if my kids go to bed late, unbathed with peanut butter on their faces. They’re still loved & all will be okay... it’s not an easy thing to learn & it’s a balancing act, this parenting thing! But it’s a true story that we would not have been given these amazing kiddos if God didn’t think we could handle it!